Just when you thought Mr Frown couldn't make his brand any more TOXIC, he decides that a heavy dose of atomic radiation is just what the situation calls for.
Once again he reaches out his great clunking fist towards the right answer – reducing our dependence on imported energy supplies by diversifying our generating capacity – only to BRUSH IT ASIDE and pick the STUPID option instead!
Earlier this week, Channel Furore showed the (rather sad) "Life After People" show where, after only a few thousand years, all trace of humans would DISAPPEAR! Except they FORGOT about RADIOACTIVE WASTE: the steaming great RADIOACTIVE sores we are going to be leaving on the face of the Earth for up to MILLIONS of years to come!
(Incidentally, we thought that the "Life After People" people cheated just SLIGHTLY when they said "we're not going to say HOW people went, just start from the moment that you're all gone". Because essentially, they had chosen the – quite UNLIKELY – "the whole population is teleported off-world by aliens" option. Any OTHER way of disappearing the human race – war, plague, natural disaster – would leave a LOT of evidence and certainly NOT just left the atomic reactors to quietly turn themselves off because they're all BOUND to fail safely just like Chernobyl didn't… er…)
Brilliantly timed as ever, our Prime Monster managed to reveal his whim (it can hardly be called a "decision" made as it was apparently without consultation) to build even more potential terrorist targets, just a day after the agency responsible for cleaning up after the LAST lot of reactors (Kim & Aggie) announced that seventy BILLION pounds wasn't enough to do the job and could they have ANOTHER seventy billion, please!
So much for the "limitless cheap energy" that they've been promising since the 1950s! This 'private sector' industry guzzles more PUBLIC subsidy than any other form of energy generation. Talk about throwing GOOD MONEY after BAD: isn't it about time we switched off the GIANT MONEY TAP and looked for something else?
Proponents of ever more atomic energy like to say it's only because of SUPERSTITION or PARANOIA that people are against increasing our reliance on a dangerous mineral element that has to be shipped here from all around the world because we don't HAVE any uranium of our own.
(Yes, between them Canada and Australia have most of the world's Uranium mines – though slightly disturbingly billions of tonnes of the stuff appear to be dissolved in the OCEANS, the Japanese have discovered – but even if it IS mined in nice safe stable countries… and let's face it, it is ALSO being dug up in LESS STABLE places such as South Africa, Russia, Uzbekistan and Americaland… even so it STILL has to be put on a boat and sailed here, subject to storms and pirates and crashing into the coast!)
Because the thing is, if you know a bit about the SCIENCE you will realise… THIS idea is EVERY BIT as dangerous and stupid as the superstitious paranoiacs think it is!
Even if it wasn't a HIDEOUSLY expensive waste of money that could more usefully be infested in a range of genuinely renewable energy sources and an industry with a PROVEN track record of failure to deliver on all its promises from cost to clean-up to containment, you just cannot get away from the fact that nuclear fission produces waste material that is both LETHAL and INDESTRUCTIBLE and the only solution that our scientists have managed to come up with is to bury it in the ground forever and hope it goes away.
Which of course it WILL, because it is radioactively decaying, but not for a very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very long time!
Mr Frown's EXCUSE for this nuclear option is the OIL SHOCK, and he has written to everyone to explain all about it.
And if THAT wasn't bad enough – because even in these ENLIGHTENED times, not EVERYONE reads the Grauniad's Comment is Free – apparently Mr Frown has taken to COLD CALLING the rest of the population.
(The Scum "wittily" suggests getting rid of him by reading him some of Lady Cherie-on-the-top's auto-hagiography. Yet somehow I feel that if I got the Prime Monster of the country on the telephone I MIGHT just think of something more CONSTRUCTIVE to suggest to him.)
"…we need to accelerate the development and deployment of alternative sources of energy, reducing global dependence on oil. Britain will increase its investment in renewables, including decentralised generation. We will build one of the world's first commercial-scale carbon capture and storage coal plants and we have committed to a nuclear building programme to ensure that the UK's emissions and dependence on fossil fuels do not rise as existing nuclear stations close."Though, oddly enough, Mr Frown seems to OVERLOOK mentioning that he wants to INCREASE not just maintain our supply from nuclear power.
(He also appears to be suggesting that "carbon-capture" is somehow going to make burning fossil fuels into an "alternative" energy source. If his letter was about reducing carbon EMISSIONS then "carbon-capture" might be worth mentioning, but since he's talking about reducing carbon CONSUMPTION then it doesn't make any sense at all.)
Meanwhile, Mr Simon Jenkins becomes merely the latest commentator (and by commentator, I mean generally the people who think of themselves as the "great and the good" and who other people think of as "those people who get paid by the Grauniad or the Windy-pendent or the BBC to spout total rubbish")… Mr Jenkins becomes merely the latest to say: "since he's going to lose anyway, Mr Frown can do all the things he really wants to" meaning Mr Frown can do all of the thing MR JENKINS really wants him to.
If Mr Frown wanted to do those things he would have DONE THEM ALREADY. When will you get it into your heads that atomic power stations, Public Private Partnerships, tax loopholes for the super-rich, I.D.iot cards, detention without trial, testing, targets and invading Middle Eastern Countries are ALL things that Mr Frown wanted JUST AS MUCH as Lord Blairimort did. He wasn't some innocent bystander, trapped in the Treasury with no power except TOTAL CONTROL OF THE ECONOMY, unable to prevent Lord Blairimort's mad power-rush, but biding his time until he could set things right. He was COMPLICIT. He was GUILTY! He was IN ON IT up to his perma-creased FROWN!