Death (3.5 billion), former leader of the not-ongoing SDP (Sudden Death Party), has said that Sir Mr the Merciless (65) is getting a bit long in the tooth.
Well, since he's the man with the hourglasses, is there something he would like to share with the rest of us!
Death suggests that we swap Sir Mr the Merciless and recommends Mr Hewn (52) because he is 42. Er. Maybe some sort of Time Travel is involved. Perhaps we could get Mr Clogg (40) to stand aged 76. Or Ms Lynne Featherweight (21) to be leader at the age of 55! I could stand and I am 7!
[R: He is 6 but this is getting confusing enough already!]
Death also thinks Mr Hewn is a Young Turk. At least I HOPE he said Turk.
Mr Death HAD issued a longer statement – but by the time it was published, it had already split.