...a blog by Richard Flowers

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Day 3061: Text Speak(R) - Cll LXion M8


Mr Speaker of the Housemartin's resignation speech in full then:

"Yer [badwords]! Ah'm off!"

In a private remark to the Prime Monster, he added:

"An' ye can tak tha' look of ye' face, ye great grinning ninny! Ye did nae support me, we'll I'll nae support ye's either! Ye can hae a by'elecshun, an' t'hell wi ye!"

Well, ONE election will be a START.

Meanwhile, and speaking of people letting their leadership dribble away, Mr Balloon was on the The Today Programme earlier this morning, and you could hear him getting more WEASELLY with every word that came out.

Would he call on Mr Speaker Housemartin to go?

"Ohh, um, er, no, no, it's not my job as leader of the opposition to, um, try to clean up Parliament. Have to leave that to others. I've got to appear above that sort of thing. Can't be seen to be breaking with tradition. Especially not traditions that keep Parliament an unaccountable box of secrets and dark practices. Goodness, can't have me 'letting the sun shine in' there. That would never do!"

Translation: he hadn't got the bottle.

Next question: hasn't he made a whopping profit on his million-pound pad in Notting Hill? Would he be returning the profits to the taxpayer?

"Look, I'm not thinking of selling it at the moment. No, I'm not selling it. I've told you, it's not for sale! Look, I'm not an idiot; the housing market is rotten and you'd all notice that I've made a socking great profit at your expense and… er… No, we should wait for the Kelly Commission on this. By the time the Kelly commission says that I have to, then I'll have had time for my tax lawyers to work out a way to… Look, I just meant what I said: the behaviour of some MPs has been appalling. I'm appalled that they got caught. But you can't have that Mr Clogg spoiling ALL our little earners, now can you?"

Translation: he's keeping the cash.

Contrast that with Mr Clogg's IMPRESSIVE performance on the Newsnight Show.

"No, Mr Housemartin wasn't a scapegoat; he'd been a roadblock to reform and only with a new Speaker could we start afresh. No, this wasn't about making excuses for other MPs; reform has to follow this, and all those MPs who've been bad have to face the music."

Mr Paxo's face was a PICTURE; he clearly DID NOT like being bested by the Leader of the Liberal Democrats.

Eager to get his own back, he came up with a SYNTHETIC question about whether the Lib Dems would support the Conservatories if they called a vote of no confidence in the Government.

Mr Clogg was quite clear that he WOULD vote against the Government in any confidence motion, so ALL of Mr Paxo's BLUSTER was ONLY over whether or not we would support the Conservatories… as though this made some kind of difference to the question? Perhaps they would support US?

But that DOES raise an interesting point: if Mr Balloon is SO KEEN on there being a General Election, why doesn't HE table a motion of no confidence in the Government?

Clearly we can't leave cleaning up Parliament in Mr Balloon's hands. Or should I say "sticky fingers"?

It is VERY IMPORTANT now that we make sure that this is a BEGINNING and not an end!

The new Mr Speaker… incidentally, could someone maybe SIT on Sir Mr the Merciless until the nonimations close. Or perhaps sit on a SCATTER CUSHION on Sir Mr the Merciless. No offence.

Anyhoo, the new Mr Speaker must work with the Kelly Commission and the House authorities to QUICKLY bring in a new set of rules BOTH for how the House is run AND for how our MPs get elected.

We have got to have SINGLE TRANSFERABLE VOTE: picking MPs has got to be the PEOPLE'S CHOICE and not the PARTY'S choice. Get RID of the FIX that is in the electoral system, and you'll go a long way to cleaning up the House of Commons.

And then as soon as possible, we should have a General Election.

Edited to add:
Auntie Alix is quite right that we have to address our own not-quite-as-white-as-white-ness if we are to convince a very angry group of people (namely EVERYBODY) that we deserve to be part of the solution.

A day after the FE (Federal Executioners) met, Daddy Alex fears that we are already FALLING BEHIND, letting our PROCEDURES get in the way of our PRINCIPLES. He has some EXPLOSIVE suggestions of how to move forwards.

I said it was a REVOLUTION, didn't I!



Richard Gadsden said...

I am getting increasingly fed up with the Kelly Commission. Every time I hear it, the cadence of the words makes me think of Kelly Clarkson, an excellent person, but not perhaps the best for cleaning out these Augean Stables

Unknown said...

and why is he "sir" c kelly,he was always a boring git when on tv ...
seemed to know very little about food or wine ?
why oh why ca'nt we just lynch any mp caught with hands in the till,
the ultimate form of true social democracy in my book.