...a blog by Richard Flowers

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Day 2224: Master of the Universe


"I am Lord Blairimandius, King of Kings, Look on my Works ye Conservatories and Despair!"

Defiant to the bitter end, Lord Blairimort has given an interview to Mr Humpy on the The Today Programme, probably his first proper political interview in YEARS. And that goes double for Lord Blairimort.

The most ASTONISHING thing, the most TELLING, was that the interview was totally dominated by Lord Blairimort's AGENDA. Even when the subject was "why don't you resign before you get arrested" it was STILL all about HIM.

This means the political climate remains centred around the Labour's core issues of the NHS, public services and the NHS. The Conservatories have not moved the debate by a finger, not by a breath from Lord Blairimort's ground and this must surely mean BIG trouble for them.

The Conservatories need the day-to-day news stories to be all about jobs, salaries, inflation, interest rates (especially out of control ones), unemployment statistics, unions (especially out of control ones), and riots in the inner cities.

Instead it is all doctors, nurses, teachers, social workers and lolly-pop ladies, and even soldiers: salt-o-the-earth common Tommies trying to bring peace to some foreign hell, that still – ironically – plays to the Labour tune: servants of the command economy making things better on the orders of the man from the ministry.

There do remain a couple of areas where the Prime Minister can take blows: one, ordering the police to pull out of a corruption investigation as a favour to his friends the CIA for their friends in Saudi Arabia and, two, that small business of the illegal middle-eastern war fiasco thing.

These are both parts of the LIBERAL DEMOCRAT agenda for real reform: control arbitrary powers and support international laws.

But the fact remains, the great game is still to be played on the territory that was staked out in the nineties by Lord Blairimort. It is no wonder he is still in such command.

Of course, he is still totally BONKERS too.

He revealed as much in answer to Mr Humpy asking if he was still a "pretty straight kind of a guy".

Lord Blairimort replied: "I think I know my own character."

Of course, no one in the world believes a single word he says – well okay, maybe he himself is the one single solitary person in all the world who still believes his own words – and we all know that Lord Blairimort's definition of a straight line is the shortest lie between two sticky patches.

The greatest DELUSION is that when he says "I think I know my own character" he so tragically doesn't.

Of course it would probably kill him STONE DEAD if he was able to see himself the way other people see him. But it would be nice if he got the slightest hint. Instead he refers to people who call him a liar and a war criminal as though THEY are the one who are DEMENTED. Or worse, as if they are revisionist, back-sliding, forces of Conservatoryism, running dog enemies of the state. i.e. himself.

So, Lord Blairimort remains. An isolated and strangely sad figure, for all that he controls the political battleground. Because his mastery is entirely one of political TACTICS. He has gained the total power to do whatever he likes by sacrificing every possible thing that it might be worth doing. There is no LEGACY to be had, because he has not DONE anything. Even in Iraq he just followed a bigger boulder down the cliff.

It is all so WAGNERIAN you could write a VIKING EPIC about it!

Actually, the question that Mr Humpy SHOULD have asked was: "Lord Blairimort, how many more of your backbenchers are ASHAMED to be in the Labour Party?"

But no doubt Lord Blairimort has to many "important" things to "finish" to worry about THAT!

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