Mr Power Cable, our stunt-stand-in for Sir Mr the Merciless, is right: the big surprise about Mr Frown's "vision" for the country – as laid out in Mrs the Queen's Speech – is not after ten years of waiting and planning how much he wants things to CHANGE but how much he wants them to STAY THE SAME.
Although he will ALWAYS be remembered for the invasion of a Middle Eastern Country, the REALITY of Lord Blairimort's regime was built around the triple pillars of a target culture, a surveillance society and a corrupt executive.
And Mr Frown ain't changing nothing.
Off TargetTypical Frown-ite policies reinforce the "command from the centre" ideology, as though the Government knows better than people what is good for them. For example, the proposed Planning Reform Bill will be taking powers away from local accountable control and giving them to yet another quango, the Independent Planning Commission – independent as in taking its orders from Secretary of State for Imposition of Airports, Mr Ruth Kelly.
Meanwhile, "Nanny Frown" is raising the school leaving age to eighteen, described as an "ambitious" solution to the "problem" of "NEETs" (or "NEILs" as I shall call them: "Not Earning or In Learning").
This is NOT "ambitious": it is OVERBEARING. Sixteen year-olds are old enough to make up their own minds. Give them the OPPORTUNITY for a place a college, YES; but do not FORCE them to go, or worse FINE them if they don't.
Is there any REAL benefit to deferring their entry into the labour market by two years… until after the next general election… ah, I may have answered my own question!
As Liberal Democrat Mr David "I am the" Laws points out: six-hundred-million pounds earmarked for HUNTING DOWN teenagers and DRAGGING THEM OFF to school could be BETTER spent on solving the problems of why they can't read and write in the first place!
Big Blairimort is Watching YOU!Increasing the government's power over your life (in the name of protecting you from the terrorism that Lord Blairmort himself helped to stir up) has long been the watchword of the Blairimort regime, and Mr Frown promises us more of the same.
Detention without trial in Great Britain is already longer than anywhere else in what we LAUGHINGLY describe as the civilised world.
Why, then, do we need yet another POINTLESS debate about increasing it?
"There is not a shred of evidence that such a radical change in the law is needed," said Liberal Democrat, Mr Clogg.
Especially when the Government is also proposing to ACCEPT the Liberal Democrat call to allow terrorist suspects to be questioned AFTER they have been charged, thus ending the pointless guessing game of:
"You are being held under the Terrorism Act 2000."
"With what am I charged?"
"I am afraid I cannot tell you THAT, sir!"
And do not forget that even if you are NOT locked up, the Government still wants to keep track of your every thought and deed by means of an I.D.iot card. They've now admitted that the cost is going to rise to £5.6 billion. And they will not stop a single terrorist.
Dame Shirley of Williams was on CRACKING FORM on the Radio Four Any Questionables about this (well worth a Listen Again, till Friday), roundly condemning the intrusion, the obsession with centralisation, the waste of all that money. Particularly the INSANITY of the Government toying with proposals to recoup some of the cost by SELLING ON your private data!
"And would YOU refuse to carry an I.D.iot card," asked Mr Jonathan Dimble-donkey, slyly.
"Of course!" stated our Shirl without a hesitation or a breath!
Conservatory Quisling Mr Alan Dunkin' Donuts got his panty-hose well and truly twisted up as he frothed over to condemn Dame Shirley, and leadership candidates Mr Clogg and Mr Huhney-Monster, for joining the pledge not to co-operate with Operation "Bar-code the Nation".
"How VERY DARE you!" he spat, "How DARE you, as legislators, the holders of the people's sacred trust! How dare you stand up for the rights and freedoms of the British People! And you in the audience can stop booing too! We'll know where you live!"
A government elected on barely a third of the votes cast certainly cannot be said to have a mandate to make such a FUNDAMENTAL change to the nature of British citizenship. If the Conservatories are SOooooo up in arms about one little European Reform Treaty, why are they not demanding a referendum on I.D.iot cards too? Or would they rather just roll over and go along with them?
Ker-chingThe Cash for Coronets DEBACLE has wound its weary way to the end of its road to nowhere, leaving nothing to show but a large snap Autumn election-shaped hole in Mr Frown's war chest.
But the recent visit of King Ablutions – boycotted by Mr Power Cable and the Liberal Democrats – reminds us of the big bribes scandal that still hasn't gone away: Lord Blairimort's decision to stamp out the Serious Fraud Office investigation into BAE and their deals with the House of Saud. That decision has now been challenged in the High Court.
Was that REALLY a treat to National Security? Or just a threat to BAE's sale of another four-point-four billion pounds worth of Eurofighters to the Arabians this September?
Mr Power Cable welcomed the decision to allow a judicial review.
And Mr Frown's love affair with Big Business doesn't end with ARMS DEALERS. No, that's not HIGH RISK enough for him! He's also backing the NUCLEAR INDUSTRY, sticking to Lord Blairimort's line and wasting billions of pounds of YOUR money on more dangerous atomic power stations instead of investing NOW in good British renewables like windmills and wave-turbines.
Because the WORST example of Mr Frown's lack of ambition is the proposed Climate Bill that aims only for an INADEQUATE 60% reduction in British carbon pollution by 2050, reliant on importing dangerous Uranium.
"It has all the hallmarks of another monumental letdown," sighed Mr Lemming Öpik for the Liberal Democrats.
And Liberal Democrat Shadow Environment Secretary, Mr Huhney-Monster condemned it as "full of holes".
Why not REALLY GO FOR IT and take the Liberal Democrat challenge to make us a Zero Carbon Britain? Lead the world, and reap the rewards of new clean technology and safe reliable energy independence.
What Mrs the Queen's Speech REALLY spells out is that Mr Frown doesn't have any ambitions beyond the cautious management of Lord Blairimort's poisonous legacy. It is not a menu of opportunities, only a catalogue of regrets.
And if he regrets Lord Blairimort meekly going along with the Monkey-in-Chief's Middle Eastern Adventure (part one)… well, Mr Frown may still very soon have his chance to take part in part deux!
PS:OBVIOUSLY it would be unseemly to raise any further questions about Conservatory Peer of the Realm and possibly Resident of the Realm, Lord Ashcroft.
Asked about his residency in the United Kingdom, a spokesflunky said:
"That's a private matter between Lord Ashcroft and HM Revenue and Customs."
Asked about the ATLANTIC OCEAN, they added:
"That's a private matter between Lord Ashcroft and HM Revenue and Customs too."