Another EDIFYING day of squabbles about how many immigrants - legal, illegal or eddy the eagle - there are in the country, is capped by Newsnight with some woman from Wehateforeignerswatch saying "there could be almost ANY number of illegal immigrants!!!!"
Well, call me a silly fluffy thing but I do not think it could be ANY number. I think it is a bit UNLIKELY that there are, say, six BILLION illegal immigrants here – you know, I think we'd notice if the rest of the world was EMPTY!
But really, I do wonder why this is such a PROBLEM. If the country was going BANKRUPT with welfare payments then you might understand, but it is NOT.
(If anything is going to bankrupt the country it is Mr Frown's payments to "management consultants" but that is an entirely other diary.)
We are happy and wealthy and safe and healthy and unemployment is low and employment is high and apparently there are lots of hotel rooms available for the World Cup in Germany. So if there IS all this illegal immigration, it hardly seems to be undermining the FABRIC of our NATION or leading to starvation on our streets.
The age-old cry of "they're coming over here and taking our jobs" needs the answer of "No! They're doing the jobs that WE WON'T!"
For that matter, why are we not selling visas? People are going to pay ten thousand pounds to EVIL people traffickers just to get stuck in an airtight container lorry or selotaped to the underside of a Eurostar. Wouldn't we be better to let them pay that to HM Treasury for a three-year or five-year or ten-year visa and then we will KNOW when they are coming and they will be able to WORK for their upkeep – like they pretty much all want to – and we might put a crimp in the profits of those EVIL people traffickers. And after three or five or ten years if they ARE working and contributing then we can give them citizenship then. So it's an INCENTIVE.
There IS a separate problem about HOUSING, particularly in the South-East, and the British Nasty Party has taken advantage of this issue. And there is a BIT of a problem about there being more people than water in the South-East too.
But if we make it a bit more easy for LEGAL immigration then it might be a bit easier POLITELY to ask people moving to the country to consider living in the North where there are houses and also RAIN.
If people want to come and live here then GOOD. If they want to come here and build a PIPE for water from the North to the South then TERRIFIC!
We should stop waffling about "incompetence at the Home Office" – yes, the safety elephant was an incompetent buffoon but he's GONE now, and the next incompetent buffoon hasn't had time to get a grip yet, so leave it.
The Labour and the Conservatories are competing to be as NASTY as possible. Well BLEURGH to them.
We should have a BETTER ANSWER.